How to Throw Your Daughter a Welcome to Womanhood Circle
Puberty is one of those transitions we talk about often, and yet rarely celebrate.
For many girls, the shift into adolescence happens quietly. A few conversations. Maybe a book. A box of supplies handed over with good intentions, but very little space to pause and acknowledge what’s actually happening emotionally, relationally, and internally. There’s this underlying tone of secrecy or shame, even when we are desperately trying to depart from that narrative.
A Welcome to Womanhood Circle offers something different. It creates a moment to slow down, gather intentionally, and communicate a clear message to a young person:
This matters. You matter. And you deserve to be held and celebrated by your village.
What Is a Welcome to Womanhood Circle?
A Welcome to Womanhood Circle is a small, intentional gathering held to honor a girl as she enters adolescence, often around the time of her first period, though timing can be flexible and responsive to her comfort. No pressure if its been a month or two before you can gather your circle!
This is not a reenactment of ancient rituals or anything mystical or ceremonial for the sake of ceremony. It’s a relational experience, grounded in conversation, presence, and age-appropriate education. Welcome to Womanhood ceremonies have been happening over the course of history, in the form of Red Tent Circles and so many other intimate gatherings. We need to continue this tradition, adapted for today’s daughters, to honor their journey into young womanhood as generations have done before.
At its core, this kind of gathering helps a young person:
Feel supported rather than embarrassed!
Understand her body without fear.
Hear affirming messages from trusted adults.
Experience her transition as something worthy of care and attention, something special and exciting!
As a therapist and a mother, I see how meaningful it can be when developmental transitions are honored and not rushed past.
Why Families Are Choosing Welcome to Womanhood Circles
Many parents want to do better than what they experienced themselves, especially when it comes to conversations about bodies, boundaries, and emotional changes. Even if it didn’t happen to you, you’ve certainly heard someone else’s traumatic “first period story.” Maybe your parents left you floundering and you had to figure things out for yourself. Maybe you were made to feel embarassed about something that is a natural, wonderful process of your body.
A Welcome to Womanhood Circle can:
Normalize menstruation and body changes without making them the focus
Offer emotional context alongside practical information
Reduce shame and secrecy
Strengthen trust between parent and child
Help a girl feel grounded as her world starts to shift
It’s about creating a memory that says, “I was supported when things started to change.”
How to Plan a Grounded, Supportive Welcome to Womanhood Circle
1. Start With Her Input
This is essential. You can’t jump into this without a conversation, and it certainly shouldn’t be a surprise. If there’s one thing I know, it’s that your preteen daughter isn’t going to be thrilled with an ambush - even if it’s supposed to be a very positive and fun thing!
Some girls want a small group. Some want only a parent. Some want something very low-key. The goal is not to surprise her or make her the center of attention, it’s to involve her in shaping something that feels safe.
Ask simple questions:
Who would you feel comfortable having there?
Do you want this to feel more like a gathering or a conversation?
Is there anything you don’t want included?
Let her boundaries guide the plan! Always.
2. Keep the Guest List Small and Intentional
This doesn’t need to be a group of “wise women” or extended family unless that feels right.
Often, 3–6 trusted adults is plenty:
Her mother or caregiver
An auntie, godmother, or close family friend - someone she knows very well!
Maybe an older sibling who has started their menstruation, and can offer some wisdom .
Close cousin, family friend, or trusted mentor.
Choose people who can speak thoughtfully and respectfully, without projecting fear, embarrassment, or outdated narratives. Don’t include people who aren’t a good fit just for the sake of including them. This gathering is about your daughter.
3. Create a Comfortable, Welcoming Environment
Think cozy and calm, not ceremonial.
Ideas:
Sitting together in the living room or backyard
Soft lighting, pillows, or a shared table. Bring in some blankets, you can even drape some thrifted red curtains for a tent vibe!
Snacks or a simple meal. I love to include a pomegranate representing womanhood and fertility!
The environment should feel different from everyday life, but not so different that it feels awkward or performative.
4. Open With Why You’re Gathering
You don’t need a script. Something simple and sincere is enough.
For example:
“We wanted to take a moment to acknowledge that you’re growing and changing, and to let you know that you’re supported through it.”
This helps orient everyone and sets a respectful tone.
5. Share Supportive Messages and Stories
If guests are open to it, invite them to share:
One thing they wish they had known at her age
A reminder about trusting her body or her voice
A message of reassurance about growing up
This is NOT the time for heavy stories or trauma disclosures. Keep it grounded, encouraging, and appropriate.
6. Offer Gentle, Clear Education
Puberty education doesn’t have to feel like a lesson, but clarity matters.
This can include:
Basic understanding of menstrual cycles
Normal emotional changes
Body autonomy and consent
How to ask for support when something feels off
The goal is to replace mystery with information and fear with understanding.
7. Include a Thoughtful Keepsake or Activity
Think of something special to do together, for her to remember this circle and reflect back.
Some ideas:
Writing her notes she can read later
Gifting a small self-care kit
Creating a bracelet or simple art piece together
Sharing a meal or dessert she chooses
8. Close With Reassurance and Celebration
End by reinforcing the message:
She is supported
She can ask questions
She doesn’t have to have everything figured out
This transition is not something to manage alone.
A Therapist’s Perspective
Developmental transitions can bring up a lot, for kids and parents alike. A Welcome to Womanhood Circle isn’t about doing things “right.” It’s about being present, responsive, and honest.
When we mark transitions intentionally, we give young people language for change - and a sense of safety as they move through it. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Associate who has spent a great deal of time providing group therapy AND family therapy to adolescents, I am well aware of how important it is for an emerging young adult to be surrounded with support from her village.
When Extra Support Can Be Helpful
You can host a Welcome to Womanhood ceremony on your own. Some families choose to work with a planner and facilitator like me when they need help:
Structuring the gathering, planning the ceremony
Holding emotionally sensitive conversations
Creating a developmentally appropriate experience
Taking pressure off the parent - it can be a lot to manage on your own and feel fully immersed!
Hosting solo can take you out of the moment. That is often why my client’s choose me, because I can take the burden off of planning, hosting and facilitating. Support can make the experience feel more spacious and grounded, for everyone involved!
